Life and Blog Updates – why I haven’t been blogging

It’s been a long time since my last blog post. I’ve been really struggling lately and here’s why.

I recently completed my Masters and I’m left in this state of limbo where I know what I want to do next – but I’m not a 100 percent sure about it. For instance, in November I will be taking the Teaching English as a Foreign Language seminar. I have also decided to take some French in December (to enhance my spoken language – otherwise, I’m pretty good with reading and writing).

I’ve been really hard on myself lately. Most of my friends are back to school and I’m ‘taking the year off’ or so to speak. I haven’t been able to focus on writing or reading or anything but this sense of loss and confusion.  I’ve been feeling bored and that I should be using my time wisely. But fuck it. I need the time off. I need the break I didn’t get to take over the summer, and I need to just accept that this is only a phase and that it will be worth my while in the end.

For the longest time I was looking for a word to describe how I felt. I was looking for something to describe this feeling of displacement and then I found it.

Monachpsis:  “the subtle but persistent feeling of being out of place, as maladapted to your surroundings as a seal on a beach…”

A few nights ago, I was out at a bar mingling with friends and some new people when I was asked what I was doing with my life – in a causal and non offensive way of course. I answered that I had a Master’s degree, and that I worked in a pharmacy for the time being until I went back to school for my PhD. I was surprised at how easily I answered the question – without a moment of hesitation.

Then it dawned on me. I had been telling people that ‘I just completed or was done my masters’ but never that I had the degree. It put a smile on my face. It felt good to finally say it.

So. Fucking. Good.

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Timeline

#15: Timeline of my day from three days ago.

I forgot to post this.

0930: Wake-up call.
0930–1030: Morning Routine (Wash face, brush teeth, put on makeup)
1030-1055: Dressed (Jeans and a tee-shirt).
1100-1115: Breakfast (Glass of milk and some fruit).
1120-1150: In the car to pick up a friend (we had plans to hang out).
1200-1220: Picked up said friend.
1220-1110: Drove to coffee shop (and obviously purchased coffee).
0115–0130: We bought food to go (Cheese and Spinach pies) and some chocolate and chips for snacks.
0130: Decided to picnic in a park with our goodies:
0130-0415: Hung out in park next to the waterfalls. It was a nice get away from the stress that is research (self-care and giggles).
0415-730: Decided to go shopping (between the mall and the thrift shop, we found some cute goodies).
0800: Dropped friend off.
0810-0850: Picked mom up and took her grocery shopping.
0900: Late Dinner (something light of course).
0930: Skype call with the bestie.
1100: Bed.

 

 

 

Everything but the Kitchen sink

#14 #whatsinmyhandbag

I carry a lot of weight on my shoulders: metaphorically and literally.

Whether I am carrying a backpack or purse, there always seems to be a surplus of items that I really don’t need but carry around ‘just in case’. Bad habit I know, but you seriously never know what could happen and if you need that one item you left at home that one day.

My typical bag hold the following items:

  1. Makeup Bag (Inside: Concealer, Powder, Lipstick, Beauty Blender, Mirror, Small Brush, a Travel-Size Mascara, Tweezers, Eyebrow Pencil, and Moisturizer).
  2. Wallet.
  3. A Good Book (Currently: Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? by Mindy Kaling).
  4. Cellphone.
  5. Keys.
  6. Gum or Mints.
  7. Tissue.
  8. Hand Lotion.
  9. Hand Sanitizer.
  10. Deoderant.

 

Ps: Feature image is not my actual bag.